The Pope gets to the underworld and the God of Chaos is waiting to greet him. The pope is white in the face but not surprised. After all, there are those on earth that warned him about such places and what awaits a person when they die.
“I see you made it, Pope. I’ve heard you’re a man of reason,” says S.
“Oh yes, I’m quite an expert at manipulating people into giving me their wealth and making sure they never ask questions or think for themselves. A necessary evil if the church is going to remain in control.”
“Yes. Well, I must say I’m surprised that you didn’t use any of that talent to save yourself,” replies S. “I would have expected that of a man who is as clever and persuasive as you are.”
The Pope replies, “Oh, I did use my powers of manipulation to convince myself, God.”
“Oh?”
“Yes, and it worked! For a few weeks, I believed that I was going to heaven.”
“Ah.”
“It was a hell of a scam.”
The Pope and S both laugh hysterically. S points to a sign that says “YOU ARE NOW LEAVING THE UNIVERSE.” He turns to the Pope, “So you believe that you were headed to Heaven? Haha, yes. It’s actually pretty funny when you think about it.”
“So why aren’t I?” asks the pope.
S looks around at the infinite nothingness around them, “Because this is it.”
The pope is confused. “But where are the other people?”
“There are none.”
“What about the other planets and stars?”
“No. Not even here.”
“But then what about the rest of the Universe? If I was to leave the Universe I would just find another one!”
“There aren’t any more. It has ended. The last one. This one.”
“And you’re not God?”
“No. But if you need a god you could go for the head honcho.”
“And where is he?”
“In that empty spot over there,” replies S.
“Where is that?” asks the Pope, pointing at a place with nothing in it.
“You’re looking at it.”
“No I’m not. There’s nothi–” the Pope stops suddenly when he sees the nothingness. A strange, inexplicable fear grips him.
“There’s nothing there. What’s there is nothing,” replies S, a grin growing across his face, “That’s where God is.” He chuckles at his little joke. “God is in the space where you can’t find him.”
“I don’t understand.”
“God doesn’t make sense,” replies S, “He’s nothing.”
“But what’s a ‘nothing?'”
“Something that’s not something else. He’s not a pattern, he’s not an equation, he’s not a number. There’s no law governing him, there’s no law defining him.”
“Then why do people believe in Him?” asks the Pope.
“Because, he gives meaning to life. A person finds purpose when they’re in the presence of a greater being. If you can see the patterns, you’re part of them. You have power over them, you can change them.” S grins. “That’s why you believe in God, don’t you?”
“Well, yes,” replies the Pope.
“Well you’re mistaken,” says S, still grinning. “God isn’t a thing you can understand with human logic. God is an abstract concept, something which exists outside the human experience. That’s what gives him his power.”
“I see,” says the Pope, nodding slowly as he begins to understand.
“Well, it’s about time I go. Enjoy eternity!” says S, and then vanishes from existence.
